Stress—Manage It and Get More Done

Q. I know I have to lower job stress. But I’ve got a high-pressure job that takes at least 60 hours a week, and demanding bosses and customers. I need this job, but it’s impossible to keep up the pace and still lower my stress. —Eleanor S.

A. It’s not impossible—just difficult—and it’s critical for your short-term effectiveness and long-term health. Actually, your situation is more typical than you’d expect. Today’s pace and pressure won’t stop. The only control you have is how you react to the pace and pressure. Try these techniques for lowering job stress—and get more done, more simply and easily—while you live a more peaceful life:

Accept responsibility for your job stress. No one can make you stressful (or angry) if you don’t let them. Not your boss, not your customer. They provide the opportunity for stress. How you respond determines how much stress you’ll feel. Make a list of situations that cause you stress on the job. Then plan to avoid it, change it, or accept it.

Re-create yourself for your job; put fulfilling, activities into your life each day.

Set personal career goals for yourself, and focus your daily work energy on meeting them. But also make time each day to enrich your life outside the job. Life isn’t a rehearsal, so enjoy the journey. Before you know it, your children will be grown and you’ll be planning your retirement. So plan now to live your life so that , when that future arrives, you won’t feel that life has passed you by.

Surround yourself with co-workers who have positive attitudes. And don’t wait for them to come to you; look for them. Spend time with them. Imitate them.

Begin your personal exercise “plan for life.” Exercise for 20 minutes at least three times a week just before or after work. Lunch time is ideal for exercise. Or take a half-hour walk because it gives you a well-earned break and tones up your body and mind for the afternoon’s work. Then follow your workout by fruit, raw vegetables or a light salad.

Take a “Power Pauses”—quiet time—throughout the day to clear your mind and re-focus. They’re well-earned gifts you give yourself to re-create and re-energize.

Use lunch for enjoyment, not work. Refresh yourself and get re-charged for a productive afternoon. Meet a friend; read; think about your hobby; be playful.

Establish regular life patterns. Get up, go to work, go home, eat meals and enjoy friends and family activities at about the same times each day. Get enough sleep and rest. Take naps when you need them. Organize your life, but stay flexible.

Start reading stress-management guidebooks and follow the advice daily.

Get rid of your work stress monkeys— unhealthy ideas. Some examples:

• You’re indispensable.

• You have to do it yourself.

• Everyone must like you.

• You can’t say “No.”

• You must be perfect.

• You can’t control your time.

Start saying “No” to lower priority jobs. Too often, we spend a lot of time “putting out fires,” or taking care of last-minute requests, either from the boss or from others we work with.

So, how do you say “No” to these interruptions—politely but firmly? The trick is not to use the word, “No” or other words with negative meanings. Instead, position yourself as a helpful problem-solver as you respond pleasantly and helpfully, in just four steps:

Step One: Choose a neutral response. Try to keep the conversation headed in a positive, problem-solving direction. Examples: “That’s interesting…let’s talk about it.” “That sounds like a real challenge.” “I know that’s a priority for you.” “I’d like to help.”

Step Two: Summarize the situation right now. Explain what’s preventing you from saying “Yes.” Examples: “Right now, we're working on …” “I’m working against a tight deadline for...”

Step Three: Suggest other options that might meet the other person’s needs: “What if we mail "A" on Monday, instead of Friday? “Can you give me two more days?” “I think one of my associates might help you. Let me find out and one of us will get back to you shortly.”

Step Four: Invite collaboration, ideas, and suggestions to solve the problem: “What do you think?” “How does that sound to you?” “Can you think of any other options?”

But what if you have to hold you ground—and continue to say “No?” What if they say, “I’m sorry, I really need this now.” Then repeat the four steps, politely

but firmly, like a broken record. But try to be flexible. Try to work out a solution that’s best for everyone involved. No one can make you stressful without your permission. Decide today to enjoy a more peaceful life. Peace.